23 Weeks 3 Days: Legal Drug Dealers

I got my bill in the mail from my emergency room visit. Just a reminder of what I had done: Cut the tip of my finger almost off, went to the emergency room, had a nurse take my blood pressure, then they gave me an X-Ray to make sure I didn't hit the bone, then I was given a room and another nurse gave me a Tetanus shot, then a Nurse Practitioner came in, numbed my finger, rubbed it with some iodine and put in 7 stitches, she left then the nurse came back in a wrapped it with gauze. I was there for about 2 hours, but I was in contact with hosptial staff for a collective 30 minutes. Grand Total: $1,135.08. And that's after a "uninsured discount" of $463.62 which brings that actual amount they feel they deserve to $1,598.70. Now lets break that charge down.

Mediations: $47.30
X-Ray: $91.50
Emergency Room Services: $608.75
Medications With Detail: $304.15
Professional Fee Emergency: $547.00

Medications is the Lanacane they used to numb my finger. They did have to use twice as much as she planned on so this seems to be the most reasonable charge though still a bit pricey. You know they mass produce this crap dirt cheap and the hospital puts a 1000% markup on it.

X-Ray is obviously the X-Ray. After paying the X-Ray tech and for the supplies and use of the room I guess this isn't horrible, but it did only take about 10 minutes which means this room costs $549 an hour to operate. Seems a bit inefficient.

Emergency Room Services is the fee for just having me use the emergency room itself. Well, is the use of the X-Ray room in this charge? I mean, if it's not, then they charged me $608.75 to have a receptionist enter my info into the computer and sit in the waiting room.

Medications With Detail is supposedly medications that were administered by a medical professional (I guess I gave myself a shot of Lanacane). The only medication I got besides Lanacane was a Tetanus shot. I double checked with the lady at thefinance office and yes, this $304.15 is for one Tetanus shot and nothing else. Again, you know that this is being manufacture dirt cheap, and then the drug company marks it up to make record profits and then the hospital marks it up to make record profits and the patient get screwed. And when I asked the lady, "It costs $304 for a Tetanus shot?" She said, "Yep," like there was no reason for me to question that.

Professional Fee Emergency is the fee for Nurse Practitioner who stitched me up. Again, she was in the room for maybe 15 minutes which means this lady makes over $2000 an hour. And supposedly, people get into the medical profession to help people... Really? And I know she's got expenses to pay (insurance, ect.), but this charge is ri-god-damn-diculous. I'm going to find a job where I install one door and then send the person a bill for $500 just for labor. They would call and question that bill.

So the hospital is sending me the form to fill out to get a financial assistance discount. That will come in the mail in a few days and then it will take a few weeks to process it. So we'll see where that gets us. Oh and their wonderful cleaning job didn't work because the damn wound got infected. I had to go to my doctor so he could soak it in an iodine solution, took out some of the stitches and put me on antibiotics. I bet if I brought my finger in and asked for a refund they would probably laugh at me.

And this is why I have little faith for any health care reform that might happen. It's not about who pays for it, it about how much it costs. These procedures and medications should not cost as much as they do.

23 Weeks 0 Days: Words Can't Describe

I was sitting in a Fred Meyer bathroom the other day, relieving myself when I glanced over and noticed a funny device on the wall. It was a seat, or really more like a "dock" for your baby. You could dock your baby there and take a dump while not having to worry about him/her crawling away. The idea already seemed stupid to me, but then I took a closer look.





Upon careful inspection, I realized that, not only was the strap to hold your baby in missing, the top two of the four screws that is supposed to hold it to the wall where gone. 50% of what hold your baby 3 feet off the ground where not even there. Hopefully nobody uses it because the strap is gone, but what if the strap was there? Some idiot would stick their baby in there, it would fail off the wall and that jack ass would sue Fred Meyer. And yes, Fred Meyer should be fixing these things, but do we really need to live in a country where our child's safety is up to everyone else? If your going to use a random device in a shopping center bathroom, you don't think you should give it a once over before you use it? And are we surprised that this stupid device is broken? I mean, the logo for the "Safe-Sitter" is two babies head butting each other?!?!

22 Weeks 6 Days: Don't Bite The Hand...

Dear Baby,

Power tools are dangerous.

Sincerely,

Dad






So, yes. I cut the tip of my finger off with a circular saw. The homeowner where I was working had to take me to the emergency room where the sewed it back on. And then they will be sending me a bill. Who knows how much that will be. $10,000. Maybe a million? And then I have to go back and pay a doctor to remove the stitches. Of course my inexpensive doctor said he could do it, but I'm thinking about just doing it myself. Snip snip, pull. Snip, snip, pull. It's not rocket science. Which makes it so frustrating that these doctors charge so much. Some of these procedures are really simple.

And of course, not only did the hospital cost me money, but it backed up my workload so I had to reschedule a lot of work this week for next week and I'll be making less money. So it double screwed me. I guess I'll be more careful around power tools from now on.

21 Weeks 6 Days: A Shotgun And A Shovel

So, we found out last week that we are going to have a girl. I do like the idea of having a daughter but we are definitely going to need to start a bank account with a reserve fund just for legal fees for myself. It's almost guaranteed that I will eventually beat the crap out of some loser teenage boy for getting a little too gropey with my daughter. And in this day and age of parents suing everybody over their kids' bad behavior, I'm sure to end up in court more than once.

But it's a small price to pay to be that dad that scares the living shit out of all your kids' friends. And it seems especially more satisfying to be that dad that makes teenage boys afraid to date a certain girl because when you come by the house to meet her parents, the first thing the dad does is take the boy into the garage to show him his shotgun and his shovel... And I'll be that crazy dad that provides his daughter with all sorts of weapons and teaches her how to use them, because nothing drives me crazy more than person who is victimized because they just didn't know what to do. Seeing a woman in a traumatic situation who is just curled up in a ball screaming is retarded. FIGHT BACK! Here's how you get out of a choke hold, then you give him a swift kick in the nuts, get your retractile asp that daddy got you for your birthday out and hit him as hard as you can on the back of the neck. Not only did you save yourself from getting raped, you can now laugh every time you see his sorry ass try to get up a flight of stairs in his WHEEL CHAIR!

Not that I want my child to be paranoid. I grew up with, "don't go out at night because their are crazy people all over the place," when 99% of the time you are perfectly safe. But at least be prepared for something. Have a little knowledge of defense and don't freeze up and at least make an effort. And if you are a couple that is having a boy sometime in the near future, know this: If your son does anything inappropriate with my daughter, I will smack him around. And god forbid he do something worse like rape, I will use my sledge hammer on his junk then I will shoot him in the face. And I might shoot you in the face as well for raising him like that. Then My family and I will start our early retirement in Panama...

21 Weeks 4 Days: AMERICA! F**K YEAH!

Dear Baby,

You are an American. I know it comes as a shocker since your mom and my distant, distant relatives once lived in Ireland, England and Germany, but no that doesn't make you Irish, British or German. You will be born in America, your parents were born in America, your grandparents were born in America, Your great grandparents were born in America and at least some if not all of your great, great Grandparents were born in America. I think there is enough lineage there to savely label you an American.

And I'm no super patriot shouting, "America! Fuck Yeah!" in the streets or anything, but there are way to many people who call themselves some other nationality than American when they are in no way that nationality. I use Irish as an example because I run into more Americans who tell people they are "Irish" than anyone else. Irish culture is cool. I'd like to go to Ireland some day and maybe learn some more about my roots. But I'm not an Irishman. If you weren't born in a country, never been there, parents never been then, grandparents never been there, then you aren't Irish. And I wonder what the Irish people (the real Irish people who currently live in Ireland) think of all the Americans who claim to be "Irish" when they aren't from Ireland. I bet they think you people are retards.

I feel the same way about people who call themselves Jews because they're heritage includes some Jewish people, but they in no way follow the religion. Jewish isn't a race, it's a religion. If you don't believe in the religion, you're not Jewish. Dark hair and a big nose don't automatically qualify you. Those people just want to be able to be involved in a group of people who suffered hard times. They are the people who don't belive in Judaism, but are constantly referring to themselves as a "Jew". Seriously, SHUT UP!

So, I'm going to tell you right now baby, you are an American. That is your nationality. Your distant ancestors are from a handful of European countries and if you want to learn more about them, there's nothing wrong with that. Learning stuff is a good thing. And I'll show you any info I have found about my ancestors. But please, don't plan on getting a giant clover leaf tattoo and start telling everyone that you are Irish because you're not. As much as America can suck at times, that's your country and you should be proud of that. We may not be perfect, but as a nation, we've done some good things.

19 Weeks 4 Days: Be Cool, Stay Home From School

Today in the paper there is an article about some conservatives who are keeping their kids home from school because the President is going to address the kid in public schools (which is completely voluntary to the school). Of course, these wack jobs think that Obama is trying to get to the children with his socialist message. In reality, he's doing a generic, "work hard, stay in school" speech which many President's have done before him. And I think it's fitting that the dumbest people on the planet find the education portion of school less important that their crazy conspiracy theory. They are so focused on hating the President that pulling their kid out of school and denying them a days worth of education is a good idea.

And they're using the public school system! You know, one of those government run programs that they hate so much? They're using them! They're using government paid, public schools, but don't want the president to address their children. Of course these are the same people who want the public school system to teach creationism... Again, these people obviously got as good an education as they are providing for their children. Their parents probably pulled them out of school the day they let coloreds integrate... "I ain't be wantin' my dang ol' kid in school with no dang darky!!!" They'll probably use the time off of school to plan more segregated proms like in Charleston Mississippi which had it's first integrated prom in 2008! (to much resistance!)

I don't want to generalize, these people aren't all rednecks. One of the places listed in the article with complaints was Utah. Right, Utah. We'd rather spend the day at home brainwashing our kids into believing that Polygamy is okay. Or we're just going to use the day out of school to sell our 14 year old daughter to a middle aged man with 4 other wives.

You people need to be put down, because I guarantee it's not the president who's the biggest problem in our country.

Read the article here

19 Weeks 2 Days: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!

Dear Baby,

Don't bother watching the news. It's all bullshit. Today the headlines read, "Swine Flu May Be Less Dangerous Than Predicted". Yeah, you think? Just like the Bird Flu. That was supposed to kill millions and destroy the country... And nothing happened. Or like Y2K was supposed to crash all computers and destroy the country... And nothing happened.

Everything in the news is always the worst possible situation ever and WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!! Unless we buy something to fix it. The news is owned by giant corporations that sell stuff and it's much easier to sell stuff to people who are living in fear. If you're told you should buy something because it will save your life, you're more likely to do it. You don't need a vaccination or most of these identity guard deals or a pre-made disaster preparedness kit. Those are just things people are selling to you as a means of cashing in on your fear. We're all doing alright despite what the news says.